Fauxgagement shoot

Hey look, it's us!

Last week, Dan and I drove down to central Jersey for a sort of practice engagement shoot with my friend Amy, who coined it a ''fauxgagement shoot." We've talked casually about doing a photo shoot with her for some time now, as Amy wanted to practice her people photographing skills and I've desperately wanted photos of both Dan and me together that are not from high school and don't look silly.

Since the "official" engagement shoot with Kelly is coming up next week (I swear, September seemed much farther away when we scheduled this back in April), we thought we'd do this one with Amy first in order to get some practice feeling comfortable in front of a camera in and test out some outfit possibilities.

I also went and got my makeup done by a hilarious woman at the Shiseido counter in Nordstrom, accompanied by Dan's two younger sisters. We had a great time, I'm so glad they came along with me because we don't really hang out without Dan around and they were really helpful in advising on colors and such. Also just boosting my self-confidence all around. Normally I wear no makeup at all because even with quick 5 minute routines, I would rather choose 5 minutes more sleep, but it was fun to be a bit pampered here.

There wasn't any charge for the application of the makeup, though I got her card for potential doing the wedding makeup as well (she was slightly cagey about her rates so that makes me nervous, but she did do a good job, so we'll see). I ended up getting the foundation (Shiseido 'The Makeup' Dual Balancing Foundation SPF 17 in natural light ivory) and the eyeshadow set (Shiseido Luminizing Satin Eye Trio in Strata), which were not cheap, but the foundation felt so light on my skin when others I've tried before always feel a bit like a mask and I loved how she did my eyeshadow. She also threw in a couple samples of the pink lipstick.

Here's a straight-on shot of the makeup:

The blank expression is because I hate it when before/after photos have differences in them other than the clothes or makeup, like in What Not To Wear where the befores all have terribly posture and are pouty/"sad." For the makeup skills challenged like myself, it's so hard for me to tell the difference when there are so many confounding factors, agh!

Dan thought it was too much makeup, per usual, but the women in his family disagreed. I liked it, it would be too much for a regular day of mine but I liked it for the photos. On Kelly's recommendation I've also bought some blotting paper for the engagement shoot as it's still rather warm in our area. I also have this thing of sweating on my nose (inherited from my maternal grandmother, apparently) and I imagine it'll be quite helpful for dealing with that.

I've got a free makeup trial session scheduled for early that afternoon with Jennifer Kang, also known as 'Mrs. Snail' in the WeddingBee forums. Most other places I asked about charge something like $80 just for a trial! Anyway we'll see how it goes with her, she doesn't have an online portfolio but I did find one example of a wedding she did here which looks a little too showy and shiny for me but we'll see. I think I do very much want false lashes for the wedding, though, I've tried to apply them myself before but have always failed. The makeup style I've most liked so far is Lois Lam's but of course she up and left NJ last year and now lives in Cleveland.

Well, back to the fauxgagement shoot. We went to a small park near Amy's house first for the swings and then picked up the balloons from Party Fair and headed over to Monmouth Battlefield State Park for all the ones in this post. Here are my favorites of the 30 digital and 6 film shots that Amy sent over:

okay, just being silly.

Getting to those railroad tracks was a bit of an ordeal, as Amy last scouted out this area in the winter when all the plants were dead and not liable to give one poison ivy. I'm glad we climbed up though, what nice lines from the tracks.

This shot is my favorite of all, I think, mostly because it shows off my angled haircut and enough of my chin so I don't have the usual "my head is so round and my neck so short" concern. Please tell me you also basically judge whether photos are good or not by how much you like how you look in them?

These were fun! Though what is not shown is when Dan took a running leap and basically knocked me over on my own way up. Beware of leaps made by uncoordinated people, my friends.

For some reason I think this one looks like we're in Iowa. We considered using it for a save-the-date card but I think it might not be overtly happy/cheerful enough.

So, lessons learned:

• Amy says we're not as awkward in front of the camera as I've been telling her. She says we should just relax, make each other laugh, talk to each other about funny things.
• She also says, "Don't be shy about showing affection. It's cute, and it serves well for capturing little fleeting moments." (I'd told her that I didn't want to come off as sickly sweet pretentious with that gazing longingly into each others' eyes kind of photo, but she's probably right that we can be, you know, like, a couple)
• It was worth the hassle of convincing Dan to buy this western-style blue shirt from the Gap with his $25 for $50 Groupon. It was also worth repairing the back of one of the legs on this pair of jeans. I think he should wear a brighter t-shirt though.
• The flat cap he's wearing looks great, it's the best $3 he's ever spent on an accessory by far.
• Kelly is totally, totally right about wearing bright colors and big patterns and bold jewelry. I really like this dress, it's a 50s cotton daydress that I just finished shortening, but it'd be better in the photos if the color were more intense.
• I should also suck it up and wear higher heels. The shoes I'm wearing here are Dansko platform sandals which are super comfortable but look more chunky than I want in the pictures. Not that I own any stilettos, but I should break out the shoes that I don't ever wear to walk anywhere and bring flipflops with me.

Now, I'm still a bit undecided on the glasses versus contacts thing. I really love my current glasses for their bold retro-ness, but I'm not sure whether contacts will help with the minimizing round headedness goal a bit more? Or I could switch them out? We're going to have one outfit change next week so I could do it then. Thoughts?

Giveaways and contests galore

I recently learned that a colleague of mine actually won a wedding in a radio contest. She doesn't use that nearly often enough as her fun fact when introducing herself to people, but maybe it does get a bit tiring to talk about it after awhile.

Anyway, a few different contests and giveaways popped up on my Reader lately that I wanted to share here:

• Lizzie and Isaiah have launched their own printable invites design shop! They're giving away one invitation suite for comments left on this post by next Tuesday evening.
• Becca of A Los Angeles Love is hosting a $150 giveaway from Williams-Sonoma if you create or add to your Williams-Sonoma registry. Enter by next Wednesday.
• Online wholesaler of flowers Blooms by the Box is teaming up with Budget Savvy Bride in a contest for a $500 gift certificate for the best essay on the DIY and budget-saving aspects of your wedding plans. Essay needs to be submitted by 9/19. I think I might write about the plan to make the dress so that the money that might've been spent on just one dress is being spent on developing skills I'll be able to use after the wedding, to try to highlight something that might be a bit different. We'll see.

Go forth and enter, my friends!

Picking the Music, Part 1

Hello! I figure I'll start with a brief introduction: my name is Dan. I am the lucky guy that Katherine has decided to marry; for whatever reason, she hasn't quite yet realized the scope of her mistake, so we're still going through with this wedding thing. As it is, I tend to get referenced here quite often, usually while Katherine is emphasizing my uncommon skill in rejecting things.

I'll be writing here occasionally, though this is pretty clearly Katherine's ship. I am, however, attempting to overcome my aversion to hassle, and am doing my best to participate in this process. One of the components of the wedding that I am spearheading is the music. Katherine's tastes in music are not particularly well-defined, but she knows that I do take music somewhat seriously.

Our initial plan was to rent some sound equipment and set up a laptop with a playlist. We would then enlist the help of one of our many technologically-savvy friends to monitor the set-up during the reception (I expected to have a few volunteers for this eminently-enjoyable role).

I'll offer a snippet of the wedding playlist I had begun to prepare:

Sing, Sing Sing - Benny Goodman
Keep the Customer Satisfied - Simon & Garfunkel
Cell Block Tango - Catherine Zeta-Jones, Susan Misner, Deidre Goodwin, Denise Faye, Ekaterina Chtchelkanova, Myá Harrison, & "Chicago" Cast
Give the Girl a Kiss - Bruce Springsteen
All My Loving - The Beatles
You and I - Wilco
Ever the Same - Rob Thomas
Quarter to Three (live) - Bruce Springsteen
The Sweet Escape - Gwen Stefani
Daydream - The Lovin' Spoonful
Summertime - Marcheeba & Hubert Laws
Build Me Up Buttercup - The Foundations
I'll Be Your Mirror - The Velvet Underground
Hung Up On You - Fountains of Wayne

This is a pretty eclectic mix, I would say, of some upbeat rockers, some older songs, and some romantic, slower pieces. I would also point your attention to the hints of jazz and R&B in some of the music.

The situation changed, though, so now, we need to find a live music act for the wedding. The fun of preparing an interesting playlist that Katherine would approve has been replaced by the fun of finding a live music act that fulfills various requirements, some of which seem to contradict each other. There probably is no fully-rational way to make this work, so intuition and feel will have to do. I'll start with a few bands/musicians that I like a lot:

- Bruce Springsteen and the E-Street Band: As far as I can tell, Springsteen is the best live performer of his generation, and probably the generation after his. I love his earlier albums; "The Wild, The Innocent, and the E-Street Shuffle" is probably my all-time favorite album, and I revere both "Born to Run" and "Darkness on the Edge of Town" as well. During the mid-70s, Springsteen's career trajectory was still largely unsettled. He didn't become a full-on "rocker" until the late-70s, mainly with Darkness. His music prior to that was a mix of folk, jazz, and R&B, with his shows moving around those themes (listen to Kitty's Back from 1978 and you'll see what I mean). I am also from New Jersey, and we are contractually obligated to like at least one of Bon Jovi or Springsteen.
- The Band: "Music from Big Pink" taught me the value of musicians who know how to play their instruments. The Band played behind Bob Dylan when he moved from acoustic to electric, and that move would NOT have worked without a band as good as "The Band." Their sound has significant folk undertones, and they were good performers on a variety of different instruments. (How can you not love the mandolins floating around that album? Just wonderful.)
- Wilco: Wilco is one of the only modern bands I listen to consistently. They have a good mix of keyboards, guitars, subdued percussion, etc. Impossible Germany is one of my favorites that they do. It showcases some great guitar work towards the end, and also has a bit of an improvisational feel.
- Pink Floyd: Extended themes, slow pacing, prominent guitars. All good things.

I am looking for a band that incorporates components of these sounds: the long musical interludes, the improvisational feel, the intra-band chemistry that allows musicians to play off of each other. I also want something largely accessible--I don't want the septuagenarians at the wedding completely alienated by the sound.

Katherine wants something that, in her words, "her mother will judge impressive enough for her guests." She is also looking for dancing, and I think she would prefer a female vocalist. (Her stipulations are rather minimal, which is good for me here, but they are also somewhat prohibitive. Perhaps it is better this way; I get some additional guidance.)

Generally, these lowest-common denominator decisions, like airline food, lead to horrifyingly bad things--in other words, people can hate them together. I am determined to avoid this fate, though.

Enter the Brooklyn Boogaloo Blowout. This is a band that Katherine and I saw live at 55 Bar down on Christopher Street in Manhattan. They were joined by an exceptional female vocalist--Leah Siegel--who really added something. The band had a lead guitarist, a bass guitar, a keyboardist (who played what sounded more like a Hammond organ than a piano, but both sounds are good), drums, and a saxophone. The interplay was excellent, and the music was quite good. We like this instrument combination.

They don't, however, seem to do weddings. They were also a tad too loud for my "don't alienate the septuagenarians" requirement.

I spent a good deal of time surfing through websites trying to find a similar sound, and I have at least one lead. The band is called BD Lenz (the band name is eponymous with the lead guitarist's name, I believe), and they are playing at the Salt Creek Grille in Princeton, NJ on Friday, September 3 (apparently as a fully instrumental group). They are also playing at a place called Yo y Papa in Morristown, NJ on Friday, September 18, and claim to have a female vocalist lined up for that one. (Katherine will be out of town for that event, unfortunately.)

Katherine and I will probably be going down to Princeton to see them on the 3rd, and I may go out to Morristown to see them on the 17th with a FlipCam, depending on how the first viewing goes. (We may just pick them on the spot then, or we may eliminate them from consideration.)

Here's an excellent cover of "Superstition" by BD Lenz:

Highlights from conversations with my parents tonight

Me: So, do you want to invite any of your friends?
Mom: No. Too much hassle*.

Me: So, do you want to invite any of your friends?
Dad: No. Too much hassle*.
Me: What about your friend _____ that Mom mentioned?
Dad: Give me the date and I'll call her and see if she and her husband can come. If they can't then there's no point in inviting them.
Me: That doesn't make any sense, that's what RSVPing is for!
Dad: By the way, I can't guarantee anyone except for myself, your uncles like to make last minute changes often.

later
Mom: Oh yeah, that's the Chinese way of doing things. The invitation itself is just a formality.

*Just to be clear, I think the desire to avoid hassle bit of these conversations is more our family's general introverted/anti-social tendency rather than general Chinese culture.

Another invitations round-up

Free templates at download & print by Anna Skye, via 2000 Dollar Wedding.

Loved the color scheme and font usage/placement in my girl Angie's invites, as designed by her husband-in-7-days (!) Josh:

I really like how the broken line border looks like stitches in Delphine Press' Hibiscus design, via Oh So Beautiful Paper.

Also a fan of the fun and bright yellow and blue color scheme

One way to incorporate the fabric/stitching/DIY feel to the paper goods might be sewing an outline around something, using bright embroidery thread. Once we get our engagement photos back, I'll take a look at them and see if we could convert one into a suitable save-the-date postcard, jazzed up a little.

I just like the look of this vintage airmail inspired set, even though it wouldn't really fit for us:

My mother used to get letters from her friends/relatives in China with that airmail border. Not so much anymore, though.

Map-lined envelopes! Too much work (if I'm going to spend that kind of effort, I'd go all out with the map envelopes, but I know that I'd at least appreciate this detail if I were to ever receive one myself.

Again with the graphic design using type, via the haystack needle.

It is a nice contrast to have the hand-lettered portion.

They included the menu with their invitations, which is something Dan wants to do, to make clear what the food will be like upfront.

Speaking of the food, our caterer came up with a delicious sounding prosecco bar! It'll include: sliced strawberries, mango puree, fresh orange juice, herbed simple syrup, and lemon twists, bitters and sugar cubes for the prosecco version of this champagne cocktail. I'm pretty excited, though I do still have to taste prosecco first, heh.

Back to invitations: this set came in a sweet little seersucker pocket (via Oh So Beautiful Paper).

I think the pocket then also fit inside the envelope. Probably too fussy for utility gained overall (I guess the idea is that envelopes are easily torn up and this would help keeps all the little bits of paper together better?).

And for the last item, I could see this tutorial on making your own fabric tape (costs $8 for the sticker machine to get started, then about $0.25/ft thereafter) coming in handy because the color blue I'm looking at has been hard to find, so it might be easier to find fabric that's the right color and then make things using that.

Boy clothes

Dan usually gets items from the following categories as gifts from his relatives: B&N gift card, DVDs, B&N gift card, books, electronic equipment, B&N gift card, more books...you get the idea. Once in awhile there are some Gap gift cards thrown in there too and clearly that's what I get the most excited about. All his best pieces of casual wear have come from those gift cards (and were then stolen by his sisters...I haven't forgotten that grey zip-up hoodie with elbow patches, nor the BC hoodie I bought him, no sirree).

Sadly, with the apartment move around last holiday season, that kind of gift card wasn't in the mix, but my friend Amy's suggested that we go on a trip to Uniqlo to get some good, cheap basics for him. The problem is that he's just so tall and skinny and angular. So far my experimentation has determined that he looks best when basically dressed like an old man. This isn't just because of how I like vintage, but because it expresses his true inner self of a crabby old man (Dennis the Menace's neighbor, but with very strong social filters).  For example, he's got a great "flat cap" from Old Navy that was the best style for price deal ever ($3!).

So that's what I'm kind of looking for for his wedding attire. Isn't it a bit weird that it's far easier to get him something that he would wear again? And in fact, I've been pressuring him for a really long time to get a properly tailored suit for the wedding so he'll have a well-fitting suit to wear for a change (see "tall and skinny and angular"). He's got a light gray one that's pretty nice, actually, though still just way too much fabric in the abdominal area.

Here are some ideas I've come across that I quite like:

I love how slimly fitting this suit is, and I like the pinstripes. He's also got nice old man shoes. (A Cup of Jo)

Suspenders make my heart go aflutter. I think I also like the higher waist of the pants.

Jazz Age dance party at Governors Island (The Sartorialist)

Suspenders and Chucks! Maybe red Chucks, to match my dress. (Brooklyn Bride)

I do also like vests over nice shirts (academichic)

Engagement photo inspiration

Summer seems be slipping by, spent mostly hiding indoors from the heat and humidity, but I've gotten a chance to slow down a bit and spend some time just staring off into the distance with this vacation of volunteering at an organic farm in Princeton. I met with our caterer today and feel re-energized about getting on with all this planning business. Things are feeling good.

A destination wedding in Iceland, via Cup of Jo. 

Lesson being, it'll still be awesome even if it's rainy and cloudy out.

I have some homework from our photographer, since our engagement photo shoot is coming up relatively soon (Saturday 9/11, the one weekend day she isn't booked this fall) and she's on top of her stuff. She's asked me for 5 inspiration images to convey the look and feel of what we want, since some people like more prop heavy and themed photos, versus arty and fashiony, or romantic, etc.

I need to talk to Dan about what he might have in mind, of course, but so far I'm just thinking along the lines of "fun, with a sense of humor, not taking ourselves too seriously." No sappy photos of us looking longingly into each others' eyes. No couches in fields, or things that are weird and contrived.

In terms of images, I've already posted this set of engagement photos that I love to pieces. One prop idea is to use Scrabble tiles to spell out the date and location, kind of like in this set from Brooklyn Bride and to underline the nerd thing. I think this idea of drawing out your own chalk backdrop is adorable:

But this falls into contrived since we are not artists and also, would just be too much hassle (Dan's heart rate just slowed down without him knowing why). Kelly's engagement shoots last 1.5 hours and she says that usually means enough time for 1 outfit change and maybe 2 locations. I want greenery and the NYC skyline, so I'd like to hit Frank Sinatra Park in Hoboken and then I also wanted to get a bit of feel of Hoboken, so perhaps the old waiting terminal in the train station and some of the streets? As an aside, did you know that Cake Boss is in Hoboken? I know when the shop is open because there's an inevitable long line of people waiting outside. Sometimes they have to go all the way down the block and wrap around, or go across the street past the CVS.

Anyway, from Kelly's own portfolio, I like the following sets:

• Meridian Hill Park: THAT BUBBLES PHOTO. Sigh. Anyway, just also overall a joyful feeling.
• Capitol Hill and Eastern Market: her excited smile in the first one, and then the one with The Onion with an article titled "Jilted Hasbro CEO Laughs Coldly As Scrabble Destroys Another Relationship." Brilliant of them.
• Georgetown DC with Vespa: vintagey feel on a Vespa and a.. tandem bike? without feeling like we're trying too hard. We don't have either a vintage bike (well, mine's from the 80s so I guess it's vintage, but it's not cute vintage) nor a Vespa, though.
• National Zoo: playful feeling
• Union Station DC and U Street: for the mix of picnic/park and urban area settings

I was going to write, "how does one pick just 5?!?" but I'm sure Dan will be able to whittle it down quite a bit.

Any other sets that people love?