60s-style STDs

Am I intentionally trying to see what interesting queries my Google Analytics will show me after I've got a post with this title? Perhaps. Calling save-the-dates STDs, as Liz has, tickles the juvenile part of my sense of humor and helps reduce any potential stress related to a mere paper good.

(customize and download from The Wedding Chicks)

Anyway, I think these Mad Men themed save-the-dates are a clever design. We're not having quite such a strong theme in ours but props to this couple for coming up with something cool and then sharing it with the Internets.

Prosecco bar

I've been skipping over most of the posts on the B-list conference in DC on the various wedding blogs that attended, I think it's essentially a networking event for wedding bloggers/vendors. Merci New York's post caught my eye, though, because as she said, "Some tips and tricks from the B List party that can easily fold into your wedding day details. After all, it must be pretty intense to plan a party for wedding vendors and bloggers and still showcase some fresh ideas."

(a prosecco bar)

Each station showcased a different prosecco-based cocktail - this one included a pretty fresh herb display. Guests hand picked the herbs and added them to their bubbly. It was such a fresh presentation and would be a perfect accent to a summer wedding.

[Another prosecco] station lured guests with a new prosecco and a splash of their favorite fresh fruit juices or nectar.

I'm going to email this idea to our caterer, as she told me one of her favorite parts of the job is coming up with signature cocktails for wedding receptions. Also, Wikipedia says that prosecco is becoming a popular inexpensive substitute for champagne, and we'd talked with her about even just doing fresh strawberry slices in champage flutes (except for Dan's, of course).

Non-floral centerpieces in clear glass containers

From design*sponge, an idea for some non-floral centerpieces:

Photojojo's Chalkboard speech bubble

I think this is an adorable prop for a photo booth: the Chalkboard Speech Bubble from Photojojo for $29

(made out of plywood with a handle on the back. potential to recreate yourself?)

Circles and pies

I don't think I've written about my idea for a pi/pie theme, have I? So what with the whole wedding pie thing, I had an idea that we should have something super cheesy on our invites about how it's a pie theme because our love is as neverending as the digits of pi, which would also reinforce a circle theme in the decorations. Get it?? Dan shot this down but I'm still pleased with myself for the awfulness of the pun. Regardless, some circle and pie ideas I've collected recently:

(cobbler baked in jars from not martha)

(felt circle bunting from Grumperina)

(circular object coasters, including a pie, from 1canoe2 via design*sponge)

Something likely to be stained and throw out like coasters probably not worth allocating budget for, but I like the circles on circles.

(parasol or paper fans as favors in the hot weather, images from Weddingbee)

The parasols are probably too much but the fans are kind of perfect because if I've got a signature accessory in the summer, it's a trusty paper fan. Extremely useful and always causes a minor sensation when I pull it out.

Banner gift bags

Some banner gift bags to match your bunting, ma'am? From YourWishCake, via Brooklyn Bride.

You could make a printed version of this with the pennant rubber stamp.

"she just cares about details because she’s a details person"

It's only been in the last year or so of actually working that I've come to identify as a detail-oriented person. When it comes up at work there are usually some laughs that's half 'wow is that ever true' and half 'do you know how many times you've been on the verge of driving me insane with your attention to detail.'

The funny thing is that growing up, my mom actually always characterized me as not being a particularly careful person (the word in Chinese is 粗, I think), not thinking things through enough, etc. but now when I tell people that one of my extracurriculars in college was copyediting for a research journal, the response is always 'I'm not surprised.'

The way this is specifically relevant to planning this wedding is that the bulk of the research and decision-making falls to me sort of by default as a result. Dan can't see/doesn't care about the difference between the various aesthetic options, he'd be fine with holding a catered reception in an undecorated community hall kind of room, but I'm not (if you and your partner both are, more power to you, and I envy your being in sync!). I want things to be pretty, and I do notice certain kinds of visual details.

Dan is more focused on making sure all the logistics are detailed out though, to make things smoother on the day of. Sometimes a little bit too much so, in my opinion, in that he'll throw things out just because it seems like it'll require too much planning or can't think of alternatives to make something easier. On these occasions when I'm frustrated that he's not trying a bit harder, I try to focus on how it is in general a good balance to my more impractical aspirations, and when that doesn't work, which is most of the time, I just remind myself that he just hates fun and people (we say this partially jokingly, but it's true that 'it'll be fun!' on its own is insufficient reason to convince him of something).

From Meg at APW, 'The Details That Mattered'

But I still rail against wedding details, or really Wedding Details. When you are getting married you end up hearing over and over and over again from the WIC (or the BIC) that, “It’s all about the details.” Or “details are what make your wedding memorable and special.” And not only is that patently untrue (what will make your wedding special is that you got MARRIED, and what will make your wedding memorable is all that shared love), but the details the wedding industry sells you are b*llshit. Piles of perfectly matching plastic flip flops for your guests, crazy expensive calligraphy for escort cards, just-so bridesmaid dresses? I mean, did you care about calligraphy before you got married? If yes, then go for it. If no, then stop STRESSING about it already.

So here is my very best wedding graduate advice:

Focus on making your wedding feel aesthetically honest (because there is a lot of aesthetic bullshit out there, and a lot of people trying to tell you that Classic Wedding Aesthetic is the only way it can be done). Focus on making in *feel* like you and your partner. And once you get to that place, realize that everything else is extra.

Because on your wedding day, you are emotionally in another place. Did it matter to me that the huppah I walked up to was beautiful? Hell yes. We were, as the Jewish teaching goes, beautifying the commandment. But did it matter to me that my bouquet didn’t turn out perfectly? No. Did I even notice the mimosa bar that we so carefully planned? No. I didn’t know it existed until I saw one half developed polaroid of it. Did my guests notice the mimosa bar or the imperfect bouquets? I seriously doubt it (and we know a lot of artists). They, and we, noticed how the day felt, and the aesthetics were only important in the way they played into that whole.

So remember the big picture. And focus on the small things with love.